With the latest collaborative BANG event on the cusp of exploding into a frenzy yet to be seen on this site, I thought I’d share some of my thoughts on the topic - The Future.
Apart from Hoverboards and a bully called Biff Tannen the idea of what the future holds is something I’ve never really seriously considered. This latest BANG brief has made me realise that apart from planning on what I’m going to have for dinner that evening or on a Sunday dreading the week of work which waits, I don’t really think all that far into the future. I blame my childhood, when your mum lays your clothes out for the forthcoming day on the bed for you there isn’t really much reason to plan anything. It doesn’t stop there, with little enthusiasm and only a splattering of consciousness I’d get dressed in whatever clothes were left for me and then trudge downstairs to my ready made breakfast. Breakfast hadn’t been in my mind five minutes previously, it hadn’t needed to be, my morning routine didn’t require me to think ahead, it was just something that life (mum) gave you.
As an official and fully fledged adult I think it would be very difficult to act with little regard for the future. No-one, not even my girlfriend, lays my clothes out on the bed for me anymore and I don’t (normally) get breakfast made for me, and now I do things like recycle. Recycling is forward planning, thinking ahead. It isn’t really thinking of what things are going to be like; it’s more just pandering to the needs of the future. My only relationship with the future is being scared of it and partaking in the odd gesture to try and make it happy. It’s a pretty chilling beast really, a complete enigma where you have to decide for yourself what garments to adorn yourself in.
What will possibly be happening in the future? I don’t know. It’s difficult to imagine that anybody does. A friend I had when I was younger was pretty confident that by the year 2000 we would all be skidding dust into the faces of old woman on our Hoverboards. I don’t think anybody could have persuaded him otherwise. He was wrong…..I think. If I was to ask him now he’d perhaps say robots are on future’s horizon, I think that’s the obvious one. But they’ve been promised for ages haven’t they? Even the first Terminator film was made about 175 years ago. Where are these robots and when are they arriving? As far as I’m aware they have been a matter of 5 - 20 years away for the last 60 years. My scepticism is rising. Flying cars? Teleportation? Moon dwellings? These are all exhilarating propositions but we’re more likely going to be faced with a peach flavoured Coca Cola or a Kit Kat with cashew nuts, and you can bet they will only be limited edition, lasting only a fraction of the infinity that the future is. Creme eggs the size of Easter eggs would be good.
Where have we come since the year 1999? What would we have predicted for the decade we’ve just seen pass by? The same as we are predicting now I would guess. Invisibility coats and cloning. Despite some mad scientists declaring to have accomplished these feats but wanting to keep it a secret I haven’t seen much evidence of it becoming reality. It’s just fruitless teasing, like the millennium bug, death and destruction to us all, the only millennium bug I had was a hangover. One of the cans of beans in my spare room full of tinned food did come in handy the morning of Jan 1st 2000 but there certainly was no need for me to spend my savings on long life food. I’m beginning to think these future inventions are one big lie. Stuff happens but the idea of the future invokes an excitement in me that I very much doubt will ever be tangible. The thing with the future is it is never going to arrive and I’m always going to fear it and covet it in equal measure…..
My head is hurting so I'll stop there. I'll see you all in the future sometime, probably Saturday 24th October.....2009?
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